What do you want?

Can you accept the notion that once you change your internal state, you don’t need the external world to provide you with a reason to feel joy, gratitude, appreciation, or any other elevated emotion?” Dr. Joe Dispenza, breaking the habit of being yourself.

Fortunately I never fell into the self help trap of- ‘5 steps to a new you’ or something of the like. I’ve always innately understood that to get to the good stuff, it will likely take some work. But the question always was, where is the map?

When in the midst of trials, it isn’t always the easiest thing to ask God/Goddess or the universe because you aren’t thinking of perceiving correctly. So anything that comes through to you appears garbled, in riddles or blurry at best.

Sometimes the best thing to ask yourself is, what do I want? What will bring me the most joy? What makes my life complete? Envisioning yourself being well, filled with joy and happy. And if we are really perceptive, we will soon realize that there is no outside source that has the magic ticket but it is all found within. The greatest hurdle… getting the mind right.

We are all so accustomed to thinking about what troubles us but what about thinking about what we actually want? What if we were to focus solely on what we want and liberate our minds from the chains of our worries and concerns?

I had been told for years that meditating was not good because I was emptying my mind, rather than filling it with God’s word. But the trouble for me was the bible was still a place to attain to- the concepts and ways of living that were listed in it were to be achieved. Sure the holy spirit would help you get there, I understood that. But I always felt there was something more to it. I found that with disciplined bible reading, it wasn’t fixing the damage, it was merely paving over it. I didn’t feel like I was becoming a new person, I felt like I was putting on a new person but one that looked like me. If that makes any sense at all…

So over the last several months since we have been out in California and I am away from the projections of others, their perceptions of who I am, I have been able to discover who I really am. She does not identify with religion. She doesn’t hold a book above any other books. She prefers nature over a building called church. She would rather love people, just to love them without an agenda. Not to love them to save them from themselves. Because honestly, I believe this is how God loves people, Jesus sure did.

I had to ask myself what I wanted. A good hard questioning of myself. The answers weren’t the kind of answers I may have had 10 years ago, or even 6 months ago. I want peace. I want wholeness. I want to know the truth, the real truth. I want to walk away from anything that feels like its choking the life out of me. Or anything that looks like a “to do” list. I want to break free of the man made contructs of time and space.

We are here to build a new world because the old systems are failing and many have already failed but a small group of people keep gluing and taping it back together from behind the curtain and telling us to not pay attention to what is going in behind the curtain. The curtain needs to come down! The veil, if you will…

Life isn’t what we think it is. Many of the things we spend time chasing after and promoting are simply in place to keep us busy and often times complacent. We have been sold on ideas and ideologies. Do you really want a huge house and a ton of money in the bank? Will that make you feel whole? You know what many before us have said about what it is like at the top? 1, there is nothing at the top and 2, it is lonely up there.

Money won’t fill you; religion won’t fill you, a partner won’t do it either. Get your head in the game and seek an elevated way of living. Real living. If you can clear away all the clutter and chatter, you will see and hear the truth. It knows you are looking for it, it will come to you. Wholeness is found in and of self. You are indeed a terrifying person when you need nothing outside of yourself to find satisfaction and that is the way it ought to be.

I hope this helps and encourages someone today. This message revealed to me was of great comfort. It freed me from outside influences or circumstances within my environment. It gave me the courage to be stronger and to know I wasn’t burying my feelings or thoughts but that this is just who I am. I am independent of those around me, in the sense that I could remain uneffected and at the same time, we are all connected. It doesn’t have to alter my thoughts and actions. For any of you that have been following me here or my other blog for years prior, you have a vague idea of my daily challenges, so my sentiments in this last paragraph may make better sense to you.

This finding freedom blog was started as a consorted effort of sharing ideas and movements toward finding freedom and freedom of the mind is a massive player. Once you reach that place, what do you have left to fear?

Love overrides all…

‘“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery.  The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?” They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”’ John 8:4-11

Can you even imagine the scene? This woman who was caught in the act of adultery was likely dragged out of bed naked or maybe partially naked and thrown into the dirt and called out for her sin in front of a crowd. She was probably scared; mortified, felt completely exposed in more ways than one and possibly repentant. Who knows what kind of life she lived up until this point. Maybe she was a prostitute or had been sexually abused at a tender age, forever impacting how she viewed sex. We don’t know but one thing we do know, Jesus treated her with dignity in a terribly undignified situation.

I like to think that Jesus was writing in the sand as a sign of His lack of interest in the Pharisee’s antics. I like to think there was an eye roll in there somewhere too. He already knew what they were doing before they even brought the woman to Him. His answer was spoken to them in a language they could understand, the law. But His answer to the woman was given through grace.

” For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” John 3:17

” God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry on Judgment Day—our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love. We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first.” 1 John 4:17-19 MSG

Jesus didn’t come into the world to condemn it and if we have the same standing in this world as He did, then why are we running around hitting people over the head with the Bible? Why are we getting into arguments with each other about doctrine? Didn’t Jesus tell us to love one another, so that others will know that we are His disciples, His friends? Why is the church so dang mean? Why do we judge others? Why do we shut them out? Why do we not include them because they are different? Or are caught up in an addiction or a lifestyle that may be considered less than savory? Why!? We aren’t here to judge either! If we judge, we are driven by fear and if we fear, love is not perfected in us. If Jesus didn’t judge, then nor shall I! Did you not know that love covers over a multitude of sins? Love raises others up out of muck they are in. Love puts a smile on a persons face and reminds them that they are valued. Can you imagine the impact you can have on people if you just do the very thing Jesus called us to do, love others? Can you see the smiling faces? The filthy coats that will be shed because someone was loved back to life?

I can remember not feeling loved or accepted, it was an awful feeling. The enemy hisses in your ear that you’re not valued and that the world would be a better place without you. It is a heavy burden to feel so low and unloved, or worse, unlovable! There are people out there who have never felt loved, never had someone ask their name, or pay them a compliment. There are people who aren’t even treated like a human being, with a real beating heart in their chest, just like you and I! That is a horrid, horrid truth to consider but it is a fact! And because we have God living within us, we have the distinct honor of loving people. Not just certain people but all people!

We are the church! This isn’t someone else’s problem, it is ours! This is our commission. This is our privilege, our honor. This isn’t a burden or “our cross to bear,” it is an honor. Papa is love and because He loved us first, we have the ability to love others.

Allow your compassion run wild. Let your love set fires in hearts, in communities and in the world! I would rather die and have God tell me that I loved too much, rather than loving too little!

Yeah but what about this scripture that says this, and this scripture that says that!? Just love, pure and simple love. Judgement isn’t our job, just love. We can take and piece together scripture to support our agendas and leave a whole trail of destruction behind us, as the church has already done. I don’t want to hear another story about someone who went to church and got hurt or shut out. It took an awful lot of courage for those people to walk through those church doors after their last bad experience and we’ve gone and done it to them again? Love is of the utmost importance, Jesus said it is the highest command. It isn’t our place to determine if they “deserve it,” just love them. Don’t expect anything in return, just love them.

Papa is so good to have already filled our hearts unto over flowing, now we just have to get out there and let it spill out all over the place! Throw love around like glitter, make the whole world around you sparkle! Let His glory shine through you! Oh man, what a beautiful thing! I am so psyched right now, love, plain and simple, endless love!

God bless you all, I hope this fired you up too, to get out there and just love on others. You won’t run out, you won’t grow tired and your life will be far from boring! Let’s light the world on fire with love!