What do you want?

Can you accept the notion that once you change your internal state, you don’t need the external world to provide you with a reason to feel joy, gratitude, appreciation, or any other elevated emotion?” Dr. Joe Dispenza, breaking the habit of being yourself.

Fortunately I never fell into the self help trap of- ‘5 steps to a new you’ or something of the like. I’ve always innately understood that to get to the good stuff, it will likely take some work. But the question always was, where is the map?

When in the midst of trials, it isn’t always the easiest thing to ask God/Goddess or the universe because you aren’t thinking of perceiving correctly. So anything that comes through to you appears garbled, in riddles or blurry at best.

Sometimes the best thing to ask yourself is, what do I want? What will bring me the most joy? What makes my life complete? Envisioning yourself being well, filled with joy and happy. And if we are really perceptive, we will soon realize that there is no outside source that has the magic ticket but it is all found within. The greatest hurdle… getting the mind right.

We are all so accustomed to thinking about what troubles us but what about thinking about what we actually want? What if we were to focus solely on what we want and liberate our minds from the chains of our worries and concerns?

I had been told for years that meditating was not good because I was emptying my mind, rather than filling it with God’s word. But the trouble for me was the bible was still a place to attain to- the concepts and ways of living that were listed in it were to be achieved. Sure the holy spirit would help you get there, I understood that. But I always felt there was something more to it. I found that with disciplined bible reading, it wasn’t fixing the damage, it was merely paving over it. I didn’t feel like I was becoming a new person, I felt like I was putting on a new person but one that looked like me. If that makes any sense at all…

So over the last several months since we have been out in California and I am away from the projections of others, their perceptions of who I am, I have been able to discover who I really am. She does not identify with religion. She doesn’t hold a book above any other books. She prefers nature over a building called church. She would rather love people, just to love them without an agenda. Not to love them to save them from themselves. Because honestly, I believe this is how God loves people, Jesus sure did.

I had to ask myself what I wanted. A good hard questioning of myself. The answers weren’t the kind of answers I may have had 10 years ago, or even 6 months ago. I want peace. I want wholeness. I want to know the truth, the real truth. I want to walk away from anything that feels like its choking the life out of me. Or anything that looks like a “to do” list. I want to break free of the man made contructs of time and space.

We are here to build a new world because the old systems are failing and many have already failed but a small group of people keep gluing and taping it back together from behind the curtain and telling us to not pay attention to what is going in behind the curtain. The curtain needs to come down! The veil, if you will…

Life isn’t what we think it is. Many of the things we spend time chasing after and promoting are simply in place to keep us busy and often times complacent. We have been sold on ideas and ideologies. Do you really want a huge house and a ton of money in the bank? Will that make you feel whole? You know what many before us have said about what it is like at the top? 1, there is nothing at the top and 2, it is lonely up there.

Money won’t fill you; religion won’t fill you, a partner won’t do it either. Get your head in the game and seek an elevated way of living. Real living. If you can clear away all the clutter and chatter, you will see and hear the truth. It knows you are looking for it, it will come to you. Wholeness is found in and of self. You are indeed a terrifying person when you need nothing outside of yourself to find satisfaction and that is the way it ought to be.

I hope this helps and encourages someone today. This message revealed to me was of great comfort. It freed me from outside influences or circumstances within my environment. It gave me the courage to be stronger and to know I wasn’t burying my feelings or thoughts but that this is just who I am. I am independent of those around me, in the sense that I could remain uneffected and at the same time, we are all connected. It doesn’t have to alter my thoughts and actions. For any of you that have been following me here or my other blog for years prior, you have a vague idea of my daily challenges, so my sentiments in this last paragraph may make better sense to you.

This finding freedom blog was started as a consorted effort of sharing ideas and movements toward finding freedom and freedom of the mind is a massive player. Once you reach that place, what do you have left to fear?